A Soul Divided
by Sorceress Despina
Summary: This Silent Hill-esque fic features an insane asylum breakout, a statanic cult, and two characters who must come to terms with their horrifying destiny, but can their love survive the ultimate test?
1. Default Chapter

She sits in the doctor's waiting room, waiting quietly for the doctor's assitant to call her name. She smiles to herself as she feels her unborn child kick inside of her. Although she is single, she is never alone. This beautiful child growing inside of her is always by her side. More importantly, for the time being, it would never judge her. It would never turn on her and abandon her in the way that Matt did. The young woman is Bella Vienzweit (a name with which nearly everyone proved incapable of pronouncing correctly; for she was of Circoian descent, and their language was widely ignored here in Galbadia. She was weary of being mistaken for a Vine-Zweet, and constantly corrected people that she was, in fact, a Vin-Svay). After impregnating her, the young man had left him (if her strict religion did not frown upon cursing, she would have been able to find a more suitable word to describe the animal), claiming that he no longer wanted anything to do with her or her unborn child. Last she heard he was out banging up some young blond he had met in Leidon while vacationing in Liedine. She tried to convince herself that she had forgiven him long ago, but her clenched fists told her otherwise.   
  
"Forgive me, Merclaedos," she whispered as she flipped through the May issue of Home And Gardening Monthly. As a Pertennist, Mercaedos was her one and only God, a gentle and loving being of great power who watched over his children and would lead his followers to De Vozweit, an eternal paradise. Pertennists were required to pray to Merclaedos twice daily. They believed one should only marry their true love, and to divorce is a sin to the great one. But Bella had struck out so much in her life that she had begun to question the existance of her true love. She longed for a kindly, understanding man, one whom would accept both her dedication to her religion, and her unborn daughter.  
  
The door opened and a short blond doctor's assitant stepped out and glanced at her clipboard. "Bella?" she called, her eyes scanning the females in the room.  
  
She rose carefully, her hand resting on her stomache, which had now bulged to more than twice its normal size.  
  
After taking height and weight measurements, she led her into a tiny tiled room at the end of the hall.  
  
"So how're things coming along?" the assistant asked, closing the door behind her.  
  
"Oh, slow and steady," she replied, smiling.  
  
After some basic health questions and examinations, she rose from her stool, tucking her clipboard under her arm.  
  
"Doctor Hamilton should be right in," she said, opening the door. "Feel free to read some magazines while you're waiting, we've got quite the collection there," she said gesturing to the wicker basket beside her feet.  
  
In other words, Doctor Hamilton will be in in about an hour, Bella thought to herself, reaching for a copy of Parenting Montly, hoping to get some early tips.  
  
Halfway through an article on breast feeding, a blood-curdling scream coming from the waiting room caused her to drop the magazine, her heat hammering widely against her ribs. Just as she was about to go see what the problem was, the door opened and a woman stepped in, quickly closing the door behind her. She was tall and beautiful with long blond hair and blue eyes, a typical east Liediner. Anglecian, perhaps.   
  
"Hi there, Bella," she said, extending her hand to the startled young woman. "Doctor Hamilton couldn't see you today, so I'll be your doctor for today. My name's Ann Smith."   
  
"What was that awful scream out there?" Bella asked, shaking the woman's hand absently.  
  
"Oh, that's nothing to worry about," she said, pulling the stool up and resting her clipboard on her lap. "A woman in the waiting room saw a spider, that's all. She has a terrible phobia. They're sedating her now."  
  
Bella suddenly realized that she couldn't hear a peep outside the door; it was as if they were the only ones in the building.  
  
"How come Doctor Hamilton couldn't see me?" she asked curiously.  
  
"Oh, one of his patients is running overtime," she replied absently.  
  
"So..." she said, her eyes scanning the clipboard. "You're three months in, correct? A girl?"  
  
"Yes," she replied quietly. Something didn't seem right. Something about this "Doctor Smith" didn't seem right.  
  
"Terrific," she said, flashing her a bright smile. "That's all I needed to know."  
  
"Excuse me?"  
  
"You're free to go," the woman said, ignoring her. "But first I want to give you a little something for being such a good patient."  
  
Something told her to jump up and bolt for the door, but she was frozen to her seat, seemingly meserized by the woman's voice.  
  
"You see," she said, reaching into the pocket of her white coat, "I usually give out stickers to good patients. But I thought that I'd give you something a little more interesting."  
  
Before Bella could move, the woman's hand flew from her coat and plunged a syringe deep into the young woman's forearm.  
  
She gasped, her eyes glazing over, clutching her arm. And "Doctor Smith" watched in amusement as the young Circoian fell sideways off the chair and onto the tile floor. 


	2. Chapter 2

Bella's first thought after regaining consciousness was that the floor was cold. Very cold. Cold hard cement. She opened her eyes, struggling to adjust to the dark. A light clicked on overhead and she screamed at the sight of two figures towering over her cowering body. They were dressed in silk black robes, their faces painted to match, their lips painted a stark white that was a striking contrast to their dark faces. She quickly recognized one of the figures as "Doctor Smith", the other was a tall man with long greasy dark hair and dark forboding eyes that seemed to peer right through her very soul. She turned and saw that she was being watched by more cloaked figures; at least a dozen.  
  
"State your name," the man ordered, glaring at her.  
  
"Who are you?" she whimpered, her hand on her stomache, checking for injuries.  
  
"State your name or your life ends now, my lady," his voice calm but malicious.  
  
"B-B-Bella V-V-"  
  
"Speak clearly!" he barked.  
  
"Vienzweit," she choked. "B-Bella Vienzweit."  
  
She looked around frantically. It appeared she was being held in some kind of basement or dungeon. The stone walls were plastered with paintings of some hideous red-eyed creature with giant wings. Just looking at the goddamn thing made her feel nauseated. A glass case stood behind her, holding what was obviously a rotting corpse. It was clearly a man, but he was devoid of the one thing that could prove it. A gallon of blood (presumably his own) had also been dumped into the case with him. At the front of the room was an altar with all sorts of hard cover books and bottles of colored power and liquids. She screamed and buried her face in her hands.  
  
"What the hell is this place?!" she screamed.  
  
"Relax, sweetheart, we're not going to do anything to you," the man said in a mock tone, his eyes glistening. "Doctor Smith" reached down and pulled the young woman up by the collar of her shirt.  
  
"We're just going to make your child....a very, very special person," she whispered, her hot breath on her face.  
  
"You touch her and I'll kill you!!" she screamed, scratching at the woman's hands, struggling to break free.  
  
"We're not going to hurt her, silly girl," the woman spat. "We're merely going to give her a purpose in this world. It'll be quick and easy and then...you can both go home and we'll all be happy. Happily ever after and all that shit, what do you say?"  
  
"LET ME GO!!" Bella screamed furiously, kicking the woman in the shins and crotch.  
  
"You're a Pertennist?" the woman asked, gesturing towards her 'Holy Family Pertennist Church' pin clipped to her shirt. Scowling, she ripped the pin from her shirt and spat on it, tossing it across the room. You filthy SCUM," she snarled, spraying saliva on the young woman's face. "You filthy piece of crap, may you and all of your little kinfolk back at Holy Family rot in hell. But you'll all get there eventually. Thanks to you. And your daughter."  
  
"What the in the name of God are you talking about?" she demanded, still struggling to break free of the woman's grasp.  
  
"You'll understand someday," she replied simply. For now, I strongly suggest that you join us. Join us now, and you'll be destined for an after-life of riches and paradise far beyond your pathetic little imagination could dream. Join us now and your child will be spared. You will be released unharmed, free to walk with us until the end of days, when the great one will conduct judgement day. The day the clouds will part from the sun, revealing an eternity of bliss for the ones who tread his path and honor him."  
  
"W-What does your....your religion do?" Bella asked quietly.  
  
"We walk in His footsteps," she replied softly. "And we shall never stray, nor look left or right."  
  
"What's in.....what's in that glass case?" Bella choked, dreading the answer.  
  
The blond looked up, her eyes sparkling, eager to recite what ever circumstances had brought that man to such a terrible death.  
  
"Richter? He betrayed us," she said softly. "And he was put in his place, as you can clearly see. He has met...quite...a sticky end, poor Richter.....wouldn't you agree?"  
  
"You're all a bunch of fucking pyschopaths!" Bella screamed, jumping to her feet. She was quickly caught and subdoed by the blond and the dark haired man.   
  
And the last thing the young woman witnessed was being thrown down on a wooden table beside the altar as she kicked and screamed obscenities (by now her feelings on cursing had abandoned her temporarily) and a second syringe being plunged into her forearm before she drifted off into unconsciousness. And years later, neither her nor her unborn baby girl would recall a thing that happened that day. She merely recalled arriving home from the doctor (she couldn't recall ever being examined, or anything beyond the waiting room) in a lot of pain that she was unable to trace to any given event. 


	3. Chapter 3

THE NEXT DAY.....  
  
Bella sat in her living room recliner, the Prichard Press spread out across her lap. A portable compact disc player sat on the arm rest, the headphones resting on both sides of her bulging stomache, playing the De Vozweit Quartet, one of the greatest (and only) Pertennist muscicians around. At least it's better than the garbage the kids nowadays are listening to, she thougth to herself. She was a firm believer in musical therapy. That is, she knew that music was a wonderful way to stimulate the unborn child's growth, as well as intelligence.   
  
As soon as she glanced at the headline on the front page, she gasped, knocking the player off the arm rest.  
  
MASS MURDER AT LOCAL DOCTOR'S OFFICE-ONE DOZEN SLAIN  
  
Heart pounding, she began reading the full-paged article as she reached down to pick up the player.  
  
On Tuesday Morning at approximately 9:10 AM, police say a dozen locals were brutally murdered in Gentle Care doctor's office on the corner of Breton and 52nd.  
  
  
  
"Oh my God," Bella whispered, her hands shaking violently. Her own appointment had been at 9:00 AM on Tuesday morning. She continued reading.  
  
Police say someone entered the building between 8:55 and 9:15 AM, and shot a dozen people inside, including Doctor David Hamilton, aged 61, and Renee Sweiss, former headmaster of Trabia Garden, located in Trabia, Cress. Witnesses noticed a tall, blond haired woman enter the building at approximately 9:15 AM, but were unable to indentify her.  
  
Bella dropped the paper, and jumped up, her hands trembling violently. There had to be some mistake. She was there....she had gone there for a routine checkup yesterday at 9:00 AM. But....but they told her....her appointment was cancelled?   
  
"Yes," Bella declared, now pacing around the room, struggling to hold back an oncoming panic attack that threatened to storm her with the strength of a cresting wave crashing onto the shores of Galbadia. "Yes, they...they told me my appointment was cancelled, and to...to call back some other time to reschedule. And somewhere along the way, I lost my pin."  
  
Something else happened, a voice piped up from somewhere deep inside her.  
  
Her heart skipped a beat as she pushed this thought from her mind, so quickly that it might have been on wheels.  
  
"That's Mesmerize dung!" she yelled, slapping the back of the recliner angrily. "I was there, and they told me to reschedule!"  
  
Are you sure, Bella?  
  
"Shut up!" she yelled, grabbing a pillow from the sofa and tossing it across the room. "Nothing happened! Nothing!"  
  
Why am I getting so angry about this? she asked herself as she slowly lowered herself onto the sofa, holding her head as if suffering a migraine. The paper could have made a mistake. It must have made a mistake. It must have happened after I left, she told herself. Perhaps they meant 9:15 PM. That's it, they simply made a mistake.  
  
But they close at 7, Bella Dear, the voice spoke up again. You've gone totally bonkers, you know that, hon?  
  
She quickly slapped a lid on the voice.  
  
*******************************************************************************************************************  
  
FOUR YEARS LATER  
  
Bella pulled open the door to the Happy Elephant Daycare Center, clutching the strap of her leather purse. The owner, Brenda Fishback, was seated at her desk, sifting through a stack of documents.   
  
"Excuse me," Bella said sheepishly, sticking her head in the doorway.   
  
The dark haired woman looked up, startled. "Hey! Come on in!"  
  
"How was Lydia?" she asked nervously, clutching her leather strap with both hands as she approached the desk.  
  
"Wonderful," she said, removing her reading glasses and placing them in a small green case. "She's a very sweet little girl, Mrs. Vienzweit. She had a lot of fun."  
  
"She's a bit shy," she said, seating herself in the guest chair. "She doesn't warm up to other kids very easily, so I was a little nervous about how she'd get on here."  
  
"Well, she was a bit isolated at the start, but she joined in after awhile. They always do, once they see that daycare isn't this scary, awful place that they make it out to be."  
  
"Mommy!"   
  
Bella turned and rose from her chair as a dark-haired little girl dressed in an Ballerina tutu and pink slippers burst into the room. "You're back!" she cried excitedly, throwing her arms around her mother's waist.  
  
"Did you have funny, sweetie?" Bella asked, hoisting the little girl up into her arms and smoothing her long black hair.  
  
"Uh huh. I'm a ballerina," she said matter of factly.  
  
"And so I see! You going to be a ballerina when you grow up?"  
  
"Uh huh. So's Casey. She's my friend."  
  
"Well, why don't you go say goodbye to your new friends and take off the ballerina costume-it'll be here tommorow, Lydia-and then we got to get going."  
  
"She's so cute," Brenda gushed as she scurried out of the room in her tutu. "An angel."   
  
"Well, I don't know about that," Bella said, smiling.   
  
"How was your first day?" Brenda asked, leaning back in her chair.  
  
"Good," she replied, nodding. She had excepted a full time job as a sales clerk at Lacy's Department Store. While it wasn't much, she was willing to take what ever she could get in order to support Lydia. For she was still single, and day in and day out, she experienced the struggle of daily life as a single parent.  
  
"It's tough being a single parent, isin't it?" Brenda asked, as if she were reading her mind.  
  
"It's a struggle. I get through it one day at a time."  
  
"That's the only way," she said, taking a sip of bottled water. "I would know, I was single when my youngest was born. I nearly had to go on welfare. It was tough. But things always work out in the end," she said smiling reassuringly.  
  
"Okay, mommy," Lydia announced her presence as she re entered the room.  
  
"You ready to go?"  
  
"Uh huh. Mommy, can I have my own tutu?" she asked, pulling on her mother's purse.  
  
"We'll see," she said, pulling her purse out out of the girl's reach. "Well," she said, turning to Brenda, "thanks for everything. We'll see you tommorow."  
  
"You guys have a good day. Bye, Lydie!" she called as Bella left, child in tow.  
  
"Bye, Mrs. Fishback, thanks for the cookies!" the little girl called back happily.  
  
**********************************************************************************************************************  
  
"Mommy?" Lydia asked as they walked down the sidewalk toward home.  
  
"Yeah, hon?"  
  
"Why don't...why don't I have a daddy? All the other kids....all them do."  
  
  
  
Bella hoisted her purse strap higher on her shoulder nervously. She knew this question would come, as sure and unstoppable as "where do babies come from?".  
  
"Casey says everyone has a daddy," she said, squinting up through the sunlight at her mother.  
  
Bella felt an internal struggle as she struggled to sort through several different ways to approach this question. She could tell by the look on her daughter's face that any stalling tactics she could muster would be useless. But did Merclaedos expect her to tell her four year old daughter that her father was a despicable human being who abandoned mommy, causing her to stay in bed and refuse food for five days?   
  
"She's right, Lydie. Everyone has a mommy and a daddy. But some kids...some kids don't get to see their daddies."  
  
"How come?"  
  
"It's just the way life works out some times, Lydie."  
  
"Where's my daddy?" the little girl asked, her tiny voice heart-breakingly innocent.  
  
Desperately struggling to avoid her daughter's inquiring brown eyes, Bella quickly fumbled for answers.  
  
"Your daddy left, honey. He left before you were born."  
  
"Why?" she asked, her face scrunched up in curiousity.  
  
"Because he didn't want to help take care of you," she replied honestly, carefully avoiding the words "didn't want you".  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"Sometimes people get scared when they learn they have to be a daddy," she replied, choosing her words with extra caution. "Being a daddy's a lot of work, and some people get scared by that. They don't want the respons-they don't want the job of being a daddy. They think it'll...they think it'll be too hard. That they won't be able to have fun and go out with their friends and do things anymore. But it wasn't right to leave mommy like that. When people make babies, they agree to care for and raise that baby. Some people, like your father, back out."  
  
"That's not very nice," Lydia said thoughtfully. "Where's daddy now, mommy?"  
  
"I don't know, honey. He left and we lost con-we don't talk anymore."  
  
"But it's not fair, I want a daddy!" Lydia protested, kicking a rock on the sidewalk. "Can't you get a new daddy?"  
  
Sure, Lydia, she thought irritably. Get a new daddy. I'd love nothing more than for you to have someone to help me tuck you in at night. To be there in the front row at your preschool graduation. To snap a dozen pictures and warn your date to take care of his little girl as you shoot him a warning look on prom night. I long for it all, Lydia, but to dwell on a longing is to dwell on a dream that will never come to light, a ship that will never come to shore. One can waste away on a longing, on a hope, a dream. No one knows this more than me, Lydie.  
  
"Look at the doggy!" Lydia exclaimed suddenly, barreling down the sidewalk toward a stray Newfoundland.  
  
"Lydia Marie, get back here! Don't touch him!"  
  
It was too late, the child had bent down and was rubbing the dog's neck as he licked her up the side of the face.  
  
"It's alright," a voice said from beside them. Bella turned to see a tall man with chestnut brown hair and a goatee holding a leash. "Bingo's friendly, just disobediant. I've been looking everywhere from him. He's got a new trick where he slips out of his collar everytime he sees a squirrell. I'm babysitting him for the weekend."  
  
"How'd you get roped into that?" Bella asked, smiling.  
  
He laughed as he hooked the leash ontot he dog's collar.  
  
"He's huge!" Lydia exclaimed.  
  
"He's a big guy, ain't he?" he patted the dog on the head and turned to Bella. "You've got a cute kid," he said smiling.  
  
"Thanks. I'm Bella Vienzweit," she said, extending her hand.  
  
"Doug Murray," he said, grasping her hand. "I'm new in town. It's a pleasure to meet you."  
  
"Likewise. Come on, Lydie, honey, say goodbye to the doggie, we go to get going, babe!"  
  
"Say, Bella, I was planning on heading down to the Sunset Cafe after I got Fido here home. I'd love it if you and your girl would join me." 


	4. Chapter 4

The next day at daycare Lydia sat at the table eating a chocolate chip cookie and telling her new friends about the young man whom her mother had seemed smitten with the night before.  
  
"I don't know, but maybe he can be my daddy," Lydia said, a mouth full of chewed up cookie.  
  
"Is he nice?" Casey Lernburg, the little girl with the dirty dishwater hair seated beside her asked.  
  
"Yeah. He bought me ice cream and stuff. I think mommy should marry him."  
  
After snacktime the caretaker Linda Reese watched as the beautiful Circoian child seated herself in front of the costume trunk and began pulling articles out, the little blond knelt beside her.  
  
There was something utterly fascinating about the child, she thought to herself as she stared absently. The child radiated an amazing aura that captivated her every time she laid eyes on her. She watched as the girl pullout a pink tutu triumphantly.  
  
"Found it!" she exclaimed delightedly, wrapping it around her waist and closing the velcro tab.  
  
"I want to try it on!" Casey yelled, reaching for the velcro tab.  
  
"After me," she rpelied calmly.  
  
"I want to try it!" the little blond cried, ripping the skirt off of her companian.  
  
"NO!" Lydia shrieked. And before Linda could intervene, the innocent, beautiful little girl threw herself on top of her companion, her tiny little hands wrapped tightly around the girl's throat. As the poor blond gasped for air, Lydia began slamming the poor girl's head up and down on the carpeted floor, harder and swifter was each blow she delivered.  
  
"LYDIA, STOP IT NOW!" Linda shrieked, diving towards the pair in horror. All of the children dropped their toys and stared, open-mouthed as the quiet little girl repeatedly slammed the girl's skull onto the playroom floor.  
  
"LET GO OF HER!" Linda cried, grabbing the girl by the shoulders and wrenching her off of the gagging blond who was desperately gasping for air.  
  
Lydia fell to the floor on top of the caretaker.  
  
"Lydia, what is WRONG with you?!" Linda demanded, pulling her up by the arm. "What the hell were you trying to do to her?!"  
  
She quickly rushed to Casey's side, who was now sitting up, coughing violently. "Casey, honey, are you alright? Can you talk to me, sweetheart? Oh my God, look at your head...."  
  
Lydia rushed to the girl's side, her eyes wide. "Casey, are you okay?"  
  
"GET AWAY FROM HER YOU LITTLE MONSTER!" Linda screamed, pushing the child to the floor.   
  
"What on Earth is going on out here?!" Brenda the manager demanded as she rushed into the room. Her eyes quickly fell on the gasping, crying blond and the small splash of blood on the carpeting. "My God, what happened to her?"  
  
"Her head is bleeding, we need to get her to a hospital."  
  
Brenda knelt down beside the child, closly examining her head. "It looks like it's cut, but better safe than sorry. What the heck happened out here?" she demanded.  
  
"Ask her!" Linda demanded, pointing to the dark haired child who was seated on the floor, staring wide-eyed in horror at the injured girl.  
  
"I didn't mean to hurt her," she sputtered, her eyes filling with tears. "I didn't-I didn't mean to..."  
  
"Lydia, go into my office now for a time out. I'll be in as soon as I take care of this."  
  
Bursting into tears, the girl started towards the office, sobbing.  
  
"Delores!" Brenda called to the cook. "Will you take her to the ER for me? See that she gets that head checked out. It doesn't looks serious, but there's blood."  
  
"Blood?!" Casey cried, her eyes widening.  
  
"It's alright, sweetie, come with me," the elderly cook reassured her as she scopped the child up, one hand over the child's cut head. "You're alright, babe."  
  
"She tried to kill me!" the little girl cried, staring in horror at the office doorway where the sobbing child stood watching her friend being taken away. "She tried to kill me!!"  
  
**********************************************************************  
  
When Brenda entered the office after phoning the child's mother, the girl was seated in the guest chair, tears running down her cheeks, swinging her feet slowly back and forth.  
  
"Lydia? What do you have to say for yourself?"  
  
"I-I didn't mean to hurt her, Mrs. Fishback. She's my friend. Am I gonna go to jail? Please don't take me to jail, Mrs. Fishback, you can't! You just can't!"  
  
"No one's going to take you to jail, Lydia, but this is a very serious matter, don't you think? You could have killed Casey, do you know that?"  
  
The girl sat in silence, tears streaking down her face and onto her shirt.  
  
"Mr. Saw, you're so naughty," she said, staring down at her feet. "You're so naughty sometimes, Mr. Saw."  
  
Brenda leaned forward in her chair, studying the child's face closely. "Lydia, what are you talking about? Who is Mr. Saw?"  
  
"Mr. Saw's my friend," she said, a faint hint of pride in the little girl's voice. "He talks to me."  
  
"You have an invisible friend?"  
  
"I dunno. Sometimes he's nice and talks to me and stuff. But sometimes he scares me," she said srunching up her face in deep thought.  
  
"And what sort of things does he say to you, Lydia?"  
  
"Nice things, usually. Sometimes he gives me nightmares, though. Then Mommy has to change the sheets. Then I feel like a little baby."  
  
"Tell me what he shows you," Brenda commanded, leaning over the desk.  
  
"All kinds of stuff. Lots of times he show me...he show me pretty stuff. Like mountains and stuff. And fields with, like, all these....all these flowers and stuff. Really pretty stuff. And I wish I was there. And sometimes he shows really really bad stuff. REALLY bad stuff."  
  
"Lydia, why did you attack Casey? From what I've seen, you're a very sweet little girl. Why would you go after your friend like that? That's not the Lydia I know."  
  
"Mr. Saw," she replied simply.  
  
The door opened and the child's mother walked in, pale. "Is Casey going to be alright?" she asked Brenda.  
  
"She should be fine," she replied, rising from her chair. "It looks like a minor cut to me, but I'm no nurse."  
  
"I'm so sorry, Mrs. Fishback, I've never known her to behave like that before. I can't apologize enough."  
  
"Lydia, why don't you leave for a second so I can talk to your mommy for a minute?"  
  
"I don't want to go back out there," the little girl protested, shaking her head. "Mr. Saw might be bad again."  
  
"You'll be fine, just go wait outside the door for me, Lydia."  
  
After the child left, closing the door quietly behind her, Bella turned to the tall, stern woman who stood behind the desk.  
  
"Do you know who this "Mr. Saw" that she refers to is?"  
  
"She....she speaks of him sometimes," Bella replied thoughtfully. "She gets these visions occasionally. She says Mr. Saw shows her fields and golden castles and stuff. She has quite an imagination."  
  
"She tells me she's had nightmares...?"  
  
"Y-yes, she's given me quite a fright before. Once very couple months she'll wake you up, screaming hysterically. And I just can't believe the things she tells me she sees in those nightmares of hers. Stuff that I....stuff that scares me a little. Stuff that I can't even comprehend a little girl like her coming up with."  
  
"What kind of stuff, Mrs. Vienzweit?"  
  
"Stuff I don't even want to repeat," she replied quickly. "Stuff that I can't even bring myself to repeat. Her doctor...he says it's a phase. He says Mr. Saw has been a close companion of hers for years, and now that she's grown, she's trying to...trying to flush him out, so to speak. And he thinks that these nightmares are her subconscious method of flushing him from her childhood."  
  
"Interesting," Brenda said, tapping her teeth with the eraser of her pencil.   
  
"What does an invisible friend have to do with all of this?"  
  
"I really don't know. But it sounds as if she's trying to blame this imaginary friend for her behavior today. It's perfectly normal among kids her age to seek a way around punishment. She needs to understand that we aren't going to accept any excuses for her behavior."  
  
"I agree. I just can't believe this happened, she's usually so well behaved..."  
  
"Sometimes kids can be unpredictable at that age. I'm willing to classify it as a temper tantrum that got out of control. As fond as I am of her, if anything such as this occurs again, I won't hesitate to have her membership removed permanently. The kids are going to be terrified of her come tommorow as it is, and we don't need that kind of atmosphere around here."  
  
"I can imagine. You have my assurance she'll be punished when I get her home."  
  
  
  
"If the nightmares persist....if this behavior persists....I think the best thing to do would be to get her to a child phsycologist. 


	5. Chapter 5

Late that night as Bella stood at the bathroom sink, clutching her toothbrush and watching the water run down the drain she found herself lost in thought. Amazingly, she found herself in the depths of a lustful fantasy. Of imagining how Doug's lips might feel on her own....on her flesh...she turned off the faucet, scolding herself. Lust was a sin to Merclaedos, she had been taught that since her early childhood, and here she was trying to imagine how the lips of a man she had just met would feel on her breasts. But strangely, enough, it felt....right. She felt a strong desire to be with this man at all costs, no matter what the consequences.   
  
No matter what? Even if he's a drug addict? she asked herself, gazing into the mirror.  
  
"Even if he's a drug addict," she murmered. "I want him."  
  
Dear God, Bella, listen to yourself! her conscious roared from inside her. You sound like an absolute heathen!  
  
Tying the sash on her pink bathrobe, she opened the bathroom door and walked out, picking up her copy of "Stories Of Faith And Healing For Pertennists" from the bureau. She stopped in her tracks and the book fell from her hands as she saw her daughter standing in the doorway.  
  
Four year old Lydia stood in the doorway clad in her Chibby The Chocobo pajamas. Her long dark hair was matted and tangled, and in her right hand she held a sharp kitchen knife, the blade gleaming in the lamplight.  
  
"Lydia! What are you doing with that?" Bella stammered, rushing to the child's side. "Give me that, you know better than to play with knives," she scolded, taking the knife from the girl's fist. "What's wrong with you?"  
  
"Saw. Mr. Saw," she babbled, staring past her mother into space, her brown eyes wide and emotionless. "No, Mr. Saw, stop being so naughty, won't you?"  
  
"Lydia, what are you talking about? Who is Mr. Saw?"  
  
"Mr. Saaaaaw. Saaaaw. Why won't you leave me alone," she sputtered, saliva trickling down her chin.  
  
"Lydia, WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!" Bella shouted, giving the girl a shake.  
  
"Suffering....pestilence...famine....it's all mine," she said matter-of-factly as if reading from a book. Words the child was not even familiar with, pouring from her mouth like a waterfall. "All mine. All mine. Oh, my pleasure, Mr. Saw. Only too glad to help, happy to help-"  
  
"STOP IT!!" Bella screamed, slapping the girl across the face.  
  
Lydia's eyes immediately returned to normal and quickly focused on her mother. She quickly opened her mouth in an ear piercing scream of pain, as she held her cheek.  
  
"Lydia...I'm sorry....here, babe..." she reached out and pulled the child tight, stroking her matted hair.  
  
"Why did you hit me?" the girl choked, pulling away from her mother. "I was sleeping and you HIT me!" she cried, staring at her mother in fear.  
  
"Lydia, what HAPPENED to you? You came in here holding a knife and talking about Mr.Saw..."  
  
"Mommy, what are you talking about?"  
  
Bella picked up the knife she had pried from the girl's hands and thrust it in her face.  
  
"This. You came in holding this. Were you trying to be funny, Lydia Marie? Do you think this is a joke?" she demanded, grabbing ahold of the girl's forearm.  
  
"What are you TALKING about?" the little girl whined, twisting out of her mother's grasp. "Why did you wake me up?" she demanded, crossing her arms.  
  
"I'm TIRED of this Mr. Saw crap!" she yelled in the girl's face, tossing the knife behind her carelessly. "I'm tired of hearing your childish excuses! I'm sick of this nonsense! WHO IS HE?!" she screamed, spraying saliva in the girl's face.  
  
"Mommy, stop! You're HURTING ME!" she screamed, struggling to break free of her mother's grasp.  
  
"TELL ME, YOU LITTLE SHIT!!" Bella screamed, a mere inch away from the girl's terror-striken face.  
  
Lydia stopped her tearful struggle and gazed at her mother in slack-jawed shock.  
  
Bella let go of the girl's pajama collar, her hands trembling, and fell against the bed, her eyes welling with tears.  
  
"Mommy....?" the little girl asked uncertainly, taking a cautious step toward her weeping mother. "Are you-"  
  
The girl flinched as her mother reached out and grabbed the girl, pulling her towards her. Weeping quietly, she wrapped her arms around the girl and held her to her chest, her cheek resting on the girl's shoulder. At that moment, the young woman felt a deep pain unlike any she'd ever felt before. Seeing her only child flinch at her touch felt as though she had been stabbed right in the heart with that knife that lay behind her against the wall.  
  
"I'm so sorry, baby," she whispered, stroking the girl's hair. "Lord forgive me, I don't know what got into me..."  
  
After a moment's embrace, the child backed out of her mother's arms, wiping her tears on her pajama sleeve.  
  
"You don't think I'm crazy....do you, mommy? You believe in Mr. Saw, too, don't you?"  
  
"Honey, I think it's time for you to let go of Mr. Saw," Bella said gently, drying her eyes on the comforter.  
  
"How come?"  
  
"Because you're a big girl now, Lydie, and big girls don't need imaginary friends."  
  
"But he's the only friend I've got!" the girl protested loudly.  
  
"Casey-"  
  
"Casey thinks I tried to kill her! But I didn't mean to!"  
  
"I know you didn't mean to, baby. But you can't let your temper get out of control like that. Everyone loses their temper now and then, and I'm sure Casey will understand if you apologize to her."  
  
"But I can't just make Mr. Saw leave. He's always around. I don't think he'll just leave."  
  
"He will if you want him to. I had an imaginary friend when I was a little girl, too. Her name was Alicia. Back then, I felt like she was the only friend I had, same as you. I remember when I-"  
  
"Can I go to bed now?" the little girl sighed impatiently.  
  
"Sure. And Lydia-" she added as the girl headed for the door.  
  
"No more Mr. Saw, okay? Tell him you're a big girl and you're going to make real friends from now on. Alright?"  
  
"Alright, mom."  
  
"And let me know if you keep sleepwalking. There's stuff you can take to help stop it, alright, babe?"  
  
  
  
And that was the end of it. Bella placed the kitchen knife back in its holder and the incident was never spoken of again. And, for awhile, Mr. Saw was never heard of again. That nice young man that had delighted her at the Sunset Cafe developed a remarkably close bond with Lydia, and six months later, Doug proposed to Bella under the shade of a willow tree at Dasher Park as the two watched Lydia play with little Casey Lernburg. And for quite some time, life seemed to be flowing smoothly for the little girl from Prichard, like a river flowing seamlessly through a low valley without a care. But all good things come to an end, and end they eventually would. 


	6. Chapter 6

"You sure you don't want a bite, Rinoa?" 18 year old Squall Leonheart asked the brunette beside him as he held out a piece of hotdog.  
  
"No, I'm cool," the girl replied, shifting nervously in her seat.  
  
It was a warm spring morning in Balamb and the entire student body at Balamb Garden was abuzz with excitement. Today was the day that a group of teenage students would attempt to prove themselves worthy of joining SeeD-young mercenaries for hire. As an experienced SeeD, Squall was anxious to watch his steady girlfriend join SeeD after grueling months of weekened training and all night cramming. Privately teeming up with SeeDs Squall, Irvine, Zell, Selphie, and Quistis, Rinoa had played a strong roll in the defeat of the most powerful sorceress to tread the planet-Sorceress Ultimecia, a sorceress from the future who had posessed the young girl in a desperate attempt for even greater power. This was seen as a huge credit to the girl who had yet to join SeeD.  
  
"I'll take a bite," Zell Dincht piped up from across the table. The young blond had mustard and relish smeared across his chin, dripping down the front of his Saraqouis Falls, Nijgemen, Ovwaar sweatshirt.  
  
"Get out of here," Squall said, shooting him a glare. "You've already had two."  
  
"There's always room for more," he said with a shrug, reaching across the table.  
  
"It's a wonder how you stay so thin with all the junk you eat," Selphie Tilmitt spoke up from beside him, gazing at the boy in wonder.  
  
"Why is it that guys always have the best metabolism," Quistis Trepe asked bitterly from the other side of the boy, who was now scraping off the remaining bun crumbs from his tray with his index finger. "I mean, if we ate like Zell, our asses alone would be eighty pounds. Him, he's still got the body of a God."  
  
"Yeah, Budda," Irvine snickered, leaning back in his chair, his arm slung around Selphie's shoulder.  
  
Everyone jumped as an announcement suddenly boomed over the loudspeaker. "We now ask that all SeeD candidates assemble to the front lobby at this time. We will be leaving for Galabadia Arena in exactly fifteen minutes. I repeat...."  
  
"You ready?" Squall asked, giving Rinoa's hand a squeeze. "Jeez, your hands are all sweaty," he said with concern. "You okay?"  
  
"I'm just really, REALLY nervous," Rinoa said, her voice higher pitched than usual.  
  
"Rinoa, this is nothing for you," Zell spoke up reassuringly. "After being possessed by Ultimecia, being attacked by a couple of pissed off Iguions, dangling from a cliff for ten minutes, and then kicking Ultimecia's ass, a SeeD exam should be a sinch."  
  
"You'd think so, but, I'm honestly more scared than I've ever been," she admitted sheepishly.  
  
"You gonna come watch with us?" Squall asked, pointedly handing Zell a napkin.  
  
"Nah. Those deals are just big gorefests. Everyone's just there to see the blood fly."  
  
Rinoa's face turned stark white.  
  
"Great line of encouragement, Zell," Irvine said sarcastically.  
  
"Well, it's the truth," he replied with a defensive shrug.   
  
"Hey, guys," a sweet, tiny voice spoke up from behind the table. Zell promptly spilled his soda and whirled around, wide eyed.  
  
"Hey, Zell."  
  
A tall young lady of Circoian descent stood behind Zell, a shy smile on her face. She was clutching an empty bottle of apple juice, her hands trembling slightly.  
  
"Hey, Lydia," Quistis spoke up, smiling politely. "So, you all set for the big exam?"  
  
Lydia Vienzweit was a SeeD candidate who had worked in the Balamb Garden library since joining at the age of 12. She had always been as timid and shy as a creepmouse, but she had grown out of it a bit since she first came to Garden. Her mother had supposedly died when she was five or six, from cancer or meningitis or some God foesaken thing like that. Nobody knew exactly what had happened to her mother besides her closest friends, and noone had ever bothered to ask her. She was an extremely sensitive girl, one who had never left the movie theater with a clean hanky, and one who would most certainly not respond well to fellow students prying into her private life.   
  
She nodded nervously, her fingernails digging deeper into the empty bottle. "As ready as I'll ever be, I guess," she said quietly.  
  
"You'll ace it, no problem," Zell said encouragingly. "It's not as bad as they make it out to be."  
  
"Thanks, but....when I think about what happened with you guys in Dollet....."  
  
"It won't be anything like that," Quistis assured her. "You're going to Balamb Arena, not Dollet in the middle of occupation. They wouldn't let anything like that happen again."  
  
"Do you...um, mind if I go with you for moral support?" Zell asked, blushing.  
  
"That'd be great," she smiled, as though she had wanted nothing more than for him to join her.  
  
"Alright, let's blow this joint!" he exclaimed, leaping out of his chair.  
  
"I thought you didn't want to watch those...ah...what did you call them again, Zell?" Irvine teased.  
  
"Can't a guy have a change of heart?," Zell asked, quickly righting his chair.  
  
"From what I've heard, you haven't had a change of heart since you first went into the librar-"  
  
"Irv, don't you have something to do? Like hitting on Mrs. Clebold?" Delores Clebold was the slack-jawed, elderly lunch lady who always smelled of sweaty fish.  
  
"Nah, not my type," he replied, stretching his arms over his head with a carefree yawn.  
  
"Well, that's a first," Zell said, rolling his eyes.  
  
As the group turned to leave, a tall handsome young man stepped in front of them. It was Kyle Damon, a level 20 SeeD. Despite being off duty, the guy was clad in his SeeD uniform, his patented smarmy smirk spread across his face. Ever since Zell had arrived at Garden at the age of six, he had wanted to wipe that fucking smile right off the little prick's face. You'd be hard pressed to find a more conceited human being on the face of the planet, let alone Balamb Garden. Zell happened to know that his father had bought his son's way into SeeD, despite failing his test miserably. Old man Damon owned a place as big as the Caraway mansion over in Plenty, Allonstien. He had the look of a guy who had been told from birth that his shit didn't stink like everyone else's.  
  
"Did you eat your lunch or take a bath in it?" he asked, eyeing Zell's shirt. His face burning from an unholy mixture of embarrasment and rage, he glanced down at his sweathsirt, where a small blob of mustard lie.  
  
Laughing, he handed Zell a napkin. He took it angrily and began rubbing his shirt hard enough to rip the fabric. "What do you want, Damon?" he askd through clenched teeth.   
  
"I just wanted to wish Lydia good luck, that's all," he said, flashing her a smile that seemed more intended to show off his bleached teeth (paid for courtesy of father, naturally) rather than expressing his well wishes.  
  
"Thanks, " she said, smiling back shyly.  
  
"You too, Rinnie," he said, nodding smugly. "See you guys at the arena."   
  
"Rinnie?" Rinoa asked as he walked off, her face scrunched. "Rinnie?"  
  
Zell crumbled up his napkin irritably. "I'd like to shove this right up his Allonsteinien-"  
  
"I think he's a nice guy," Lydia intterupted.  
  
"He makes Irvine look modest," Squall said, shooting Irvine a glance.  
  
"Yeah, but he doesn't have my classic good looks," Irvine said, flashing him a fake smile.  
  
"You were saying, Squall?" Quistis asked with a raised eyebrow.  
  
"That guy's scum," Zell said, stacking his empty tray at the front counter.  
  
"Why do you say that?" Lydia asked, setting her tray on top of his.   
  
"I happen to know his old man paid his admission in to SeeD. He bought his way in, everyone knows it."  
  
"I don't know it," she said, matter of factly.   
  
"Why the hell are you trying so hard to defend the guy? he thought irritably.  
  
"It is a pretty heavy circulated rumour on campus, Lydia" Quistis said, pulling a tin of breath mints from her pants pocket. "Want a mint? It's cinnamon."  
  
"No thanks," she said off handedly.   
  
"It's not a rumour," Zell said, taking a mint. "It's a fact. Old man Damon's loaded."  
  
"Yeah, but that doesn't mean he bought his way in," Quistis argued.  
  
"Everyone knows he did. He never even had to lift a finger on his SeeD exam. He got his a$$ kicked, but they still let him in. He got a near perfect test score, and he didn't even do a damn thing to earn it. We all did better than he did, and you didn't see us with perfect scores. Not even close."  
  
The group stopped in the lobby where a small crowd of nervous SeeD candidates stood, hands in pockets, scuffling their shoes, exchanging last words to their lovers and friends.  
  
Last words, Rinoa thought nervously, biting her lower lip. She wasn't normally a girl to panic, but she felt on the verge of a major breakdown. She had no idea how Lydia was holding up. She was the type of girl who always looked on the verge of fainting or bursting into tears if anyone looked at her cross eyed.  
  
"Do we have everyone present and acounted for?" Xu Ming asked, her dark eyes scanning the crowd. "Everyone here?"   
  
Xu Ming was a longtime member of SeeD. Both of her parents were well known heroes of SeeD who had helped storm Sorceress Adel's Esthar palace years ago. She was now head SeeD at Balamb Garden for her perfect grades, succesful missions, and early admittance into SeeD. While Quistis was a good friend of hers, Rinoa sensed that Quistis was slightly jealous of the girl. After all, Quistis had joined SeeD at age 15 as well, and she had helped destroy Sorceress Ultimecia, more than Xu had ever done. Something told her that Xu's father had power in high places, and Cid had no intention of allowing another SeeD to take her place, for fear of losing his job.  
  
"Headmaster Cid is away on buissiness, so I'm afraid he won't be able to deliver any last words of encouragement before we send you off...."  
  
Last words, Rinoa thought again, shivering. She glanced over at Lydia, who was jittering slightly, her face flushed.  
  
I wonder if Squall was this scared before his exam? she wondered, looking at him out of the corner of her eye. Squall was never the type to show fear, but she felt certain that he had expereinced some. Not even Squall was made out of stone, although he sometimes liked to pretend he was. You're Not Invincible, so don't even try, I can see see in your eyes, everytime you lie, wasn't that how that old Ollie And The Oilboyles song went? She glanced at Zell, and was surpirsed that he had his eye on her. Jesus, was it that obvious how terrified she was?  
  
"We'll be riding a bus to downtown Balamb Arena, 30 minutes from here. You'll each be forced to do battle with an undisclosed monster. You'll find out what it is when you get there. Then we'll ride back and you'll recieve your test scores tonight, and the inaguration ball will follow, as is tradition here at Balamb Garden. Now if you all have your weapons and have said your final goodbyes, we'll be on our way. I must add that the bus is for candidates only. Anyone wishing to watch the exam must use their own means of transportation."  
  
"Well," Squall said, taking Rinoa's hand. "This is it. My God, your hands are all sweaty. You okay?"  
  
"Just nerves," she replied, smiling. "But I'll make it. If I don't, tell Zell he can have the half eaten Nutty Butty bar on my dresser.  
  
"Too late, "Zell said over his shoulder. "Already got it."  
  
"Remind me to get a new lock on my door," Rinoa muttered to Squall's shoes.  
  
A few feet away, Zell was holding Lydia's hand awkwardly. "Well, good luck," he said, giving her hand a squeeze before dropping it. "I'll see you at the arena."  
  
"I'll be there, too," Kyle spoke up, setting his hand on Lydia's shoulder. "Look for me in the third row, babe."  
  
Babe? Who in the hell was he calling "babe"? Zell thought furiously. He felt a sudden urge to knock the boy down as he ran a hand through his shiny brown hair which always seemed to lie perfect on his head.   
  
"I will," she said, smiling, apparently not the least bit uncomfortable with his behavior. She glanced at Zell before turning to follow Rinoa out of the lobby. "You too, Zell," she added with what sounded like an afterthought. 


	7. Chapter 7: The Crows

Ten minutes later, the Garden bus was making its way down highway towards downtown Balamb. Rinoa sat beside Lydia at the front of the bus, her deadly Cardinal Pinwheel on her lap. Lydia sat beside her, jiggling her legs anxiously and handling her long leather whip.   
  
"What do you think they'll make us fight?" she asked Rinoa quietly, stuffing her whip back into its leather case and snapping the locks.   
  
"Dunno," she replied, tucking a strand of dark hair behind her ear. "Could be anything. Whatever it is, I'm sure well have it easier than Squall and Zell did."   
  
"I hope so," she said with a nervous laugh.   
  
"Want a granola bar?" she offered, holding out half of the bar. "They're pretty good for low fat."   
  
"No thanks. Hey, is it true that you're related to Julia Heartilly?" she asked suddenly. "You know, the famous pianist that died a long time ago? Like twelve or thirteen years or so?"   
  
Rinoa swallowed hard and nodded solemly. "She was my mother, actually."   
  
Lydia blushed. "I didn't know. I'm sorry," she said sheepishly. "So you were, what, four years old?"   
  
"Five," she corrected, wiping the crumbs from her mouth. "She was in a car accident on the way to play at some fancy high brow restaurant out in Dollet. Charres, I think it was. I still remember the phone call my dad got that night," she said softly, lost in memory. "I didn't fully understand it at the time. I guess I always thought she would be there. You always assume moms are for life until you lose one, you know?"   
  
Lydia nodded, tears beginning to form in her eyes. "I know what you mean," she said quietly, gazing out the window past her at the green hills rolling past.   
  
"I don't mean to get personal, but....you lost your mom too, didn't you? At least, that's what I've heard."   
  
The girl nodded absently, her eyes distant and suddenly blank.   
  
Rinoa waited, but she didn't seem to have any intention of continuing.   
  
"How did she die? Lydia?"   
  
The girl's eyes suddenly snapped back to Rinoa. "Well.....she died of an unknown illness. The doctors never had an explanation for it. But....I really don't want to talk about it," she said, in the tone of a girl who might be becoming irritated, but was struggling to keep it from showing. "It's just one of those things that you try to.....try to forget about."   
  
"Well....you know....I'm always here if you need to talk about it," Rinoa offered.   
  
"Thanks, but....I've put it behind me. Do you mind if we change the subject?"   
  
"Sure," Rinoa agreed, brushing the crumbs from her hands. "So are you going to the inaguration ball with Zell tonight?"   
  
"I'll probably be in the infirmary with a broken neck during the ball," she said gloomily.   
  
Rinoa laughed. "Well if you are, we'll be sure to bring you a plate of food. So, you going with Zell?" she pressed.   
  
Lydia suddenly felt a sting of irritation creeping out from a dark corner inside of her. Pardon the language, but holy hell this girl was nosy. The kind of person who peels back the blinds to watch the next door neighbors play the naughty nurse in their bedroom with a pair of binoculars while giving a play by play to her husband.   
  
"If he asks I will," she replied simply, hoping that the case was closed.   
  
The rolling hills and fresh greenery gradually melted behind them as a land of skyscrapers and twisting highway ramps seemed to swallow the bus whole.   
  
"Are any of your relatives gonna be there?" Rinoa asked after a moment's silence. "Grand Mammy Caraway willl be there. That's what we call my grandma," she explained quickly. "She's pretty cool for a grandma."   
  
"Why isn't your dad coming?" Lydia asked quietly. Jeez, she thought, now I'm the one being nosy. She knew that General Caraway of the Galbadian Army was the girl's father. She also knew that the two of them had beliefs that strongly clashed. While Rinoa had always been a strong war protestor and a strong liberal, her father had been a war hero with strong conservative beliefs. While Rinoa had been a part of a resistance against the late president Deling, her father had been feversihly supportive of him, not to mention a general who would have taken ten bullets in the chest if it meant sparing Deling's life.   
  
"He's probably too busy. He's a war hero. It's not like he has time for petty things like his daughter's SeeD exam. I gave up on him a long time ago, and I'm sure he's given up on me by now since I never return his calls. What about your dad? I'll bet he's a lot cooler than my dad."   
  
Lydia shifted uncomfortably in her seat, avoiding the girl's questioning eyes. It was amazing. Amazing how this girl knew where every single button was, and which ones to touch to make the most noise. She didn't recognize this as a harmless attempt at a friendly conversation and suddenly felt that this girl KNEW somehow. Knew everything, right down to her goddamn blood type and panties of choice.   
  
"He's away in Liedine on buissiness."   
  
"Really?" she asked, her eyes lighting up. "What country?"   
  
"Um, Onyae, I think. In Leidon."   
  
"Oh wow, it's so beautiful there," she gasped. "I went there with my father before we, you know, started fighting. Maybe he'll bring you back some fudge. They have the best maple fudge you'll ever eat there."   
  
The bus finally pulled up beside a large black arena with the name on front in large white letters. The nearby parking ramp was filled to capacity with every kind of car imaginable. Some had to be family members of the candidates, but there was no doubt in Lydia's mind that the vast majority of them were drunken adolescents from the slums, high on local drugs and eager to see the blood fly.   
  
My blood, she thought, nearing panic.   
  
As she stood up at the bus driver's command, she grasped the seat tightly with her free hand to keep from collapsing into a heap in the aisle. The candidates slowly filed out. Lydia stepped into the bright sunlight and quickly shielded her eyes defensively.   
  
"Should have brought our sunglasses!" Rinoa exclaimed, passing Lydia as she knelt down to snap her whip case shut. The thing was always coming unshut. She reminded herself mentally to pick up some new latches. The group past her as she struggled to snap the locks shut. Just as she was about to rise to her feet, a loud chirp from above her made her jump, her arms breaking out in gooseflesh. She looked up, startled, to see a fat crow sitting just inches above her head atop a low-hanging branch.   
  
Just a crow, she scolded herself. Don't tell me you're scared of a damned crow, Lydie. The crow was staring right at her and let out another loud chirp. "Hey there, birdie," she said quietly, climbing to her feet. "What are you-" she froze as a large flock of crows landed in the giant maple tree behind her. A dozen more landed on surrounding cars. As she watched, entranced, another three dozen swooped in, landing in the nearby trees and on a new mini van parked across from her. They all watched her as she began to hurry to the entrance, suddenly feeling nauseous. She stopped in her tracks as the fattest one yet landed a mere foot and a half in front of her, staring up at her defiantly. She knew she could have kicked out at the bird and it wouldn't have flinched. She reached out to the bird and was stunned as the crow allowed her to stroke its wing, unflinching. It's gaze remained pinned to her, unblinkingly. Did crows even blink? she wondered.   
  
Her mouth fell open, startled, as another dozen landed around her, gathered on the pavement. She looked around to see if anyone else was watching this spectacle, but everyone was in the building. If she didn't move it they were apt to take a point from her score. She took a step forward, expecting the birds to fly away, but they didn't move an inch. "  
  
Guys, I don't have food," she said, feeling like a complete jackass chatting with a bunch of fat crows.   
  
A tall blond woman suddenly stepped out from somewhere behind a parked SUV, her blue eyes gleaming. Lydia felt her heart flip in her chest.  
  
"They like you," the woman cooed. "They like you a lot, don't they?"   
  
"I've never seen birds act like this before," she replied, mesmerized by the woman's beauty. A Liedinean, perhaps, the woman was dressed causally in blue jeans and a long black sweater. She looked about fifty years old, her hands adorned with rings, one a large black ring in the shape of a crow, the eyes made with tiny fake rubies, perhaps.   
  
"Beautiful creatures, crows. Just beautiful. And he loves them. Can you feel how much he loves them?"   
  
"What do you mean?" the girl asked nervously, coming to the conclusion that this woman was uderly mad, perhaps even dangerous. One of the local PDD addicts, perhaps.   
  
"You haven't forgotten yourself, have you, Lydia Vienzweit?"   
  
Her heart nearly leaped out of her chest. How in God's name did this woman know her name?   
  
"H-How do you know my name?" she stammered, suddenly unaware of the crows that had gathered around her.   
  
"I had hoped you hadn't forgotten me, but it seems you have. But no matter. You shall in due time. After Das Nuessan. You'll find yourself soon enough, Lydia." 


	8. Chapter 8

Lydia ducked into Balamb Arena, letting the glass door slam shut behind her. There was a short line of people waiting in line for last minute tickets.

"Hey baby," a large man in a torn dirt-stained t-shirt chewing on a wad of gum called to her from the back of the line. "You gonna put on a good show for us, ain't ya?" he asked, winking suggestively.

Without acknowledging, she headed for a small room to the left where she could hear Xu speaking to the candidates.

"Lydia, where have you been?" Xu demanded as she attempted to take a seat behind her unnoticed.

"I uh, met up with an old family friend out front, that's all," she lied, smoothing her hair hastily.

Xu nodded. "Lots of family and friends out there, but as some of you might have noticed, a whole hell of a lot of them don't care whether you live or die. They just want a good show to watch while they drink their seven Gil beers. You have to do this for yourself.

You're not here to please the trailer trash out there, you're here to fulfill your dreams. Don't worry about them. You have to allow yourself to become one with the opponent, to block out the crowd. I tell this to the candidates every year. You can't let the pressure get to you, because if you do, you don't stand a chance. You need to listen to your instincts and don't allow yourselves to think about anything but victory. Don't think about what the crowd's doing or what you're mom's doing or any of that shit, just concentrate on the task at hand. But we're all rooting for you. There's been a critical shortage of SeeDs in the past five years and we need you guys." She glanced down at her clipboard. "And one more thing. We also have medical personnel on hand in case anything goes wrong. But I think you guys' will be just fine. We haven't lost anyone on this exam yet," she said, flashing a rare smile.

Lydia was starting to feel nauseous. Just nerves, she scolded herself. Relax.

Suddenly the intercom on the wall beeped. "We now ask that all SeeD candidates take their places in the arena, we'll be beginning shortly," a young woman's voice called through the intercom.

"Okay, listen up," Xu instructed. "I want you all to have a seat in the front row out there. We'll be going alphabetically, so.....Ann Marie Asioto, you're up first," she said, nodding to the overweight, bespeckled teen sitting in the back. "Good luck, guys."

"What the fck are we up against, anyway?" Zane Garnett, the blond boy who couldn't finish a sentence without an obscenity of some kind stuffed in for good measure demanded.

"That's for me to know and you to find out," Xu replied simply.

After leaving the "briefing" room, Lydia stopped outside the restrooms and pulled out some change, quickly stuffing it into the vending machine that offered a wide selection of medicine. "Oh come on!" she grumbled, giving the machine a slap after it failed to give up the box of Albien.

"Not working?" Zane asked, stopping beside her. "Here, step back," he commanded. He suddenly kicked the machine full strength, nearly tipping it over. The box of tablets immediately fell down the chute. "Here ya go," he said, handing her the box.

"Thanks a lot," she said, opening the box and tearing open a purple tablet.

"No prob," he said, sprinting to catch up with the group.

She groaned, popping the tablet in her mouth. She was getting queasier by the minute. And a little dizzy.

She took a long drink from the drinking fountain and headed to the arena. Once inside she gasped. She would never, in a thousand years have imagined that so many people would have turned out to watch. Almost every seat was full. Her temples began to throb with the noise. Struggling to ignore the watchful eyes, she quickly made her way to her seat.

"Hey, Lyd!" She craned her neck and saw Zell sitting three rows behind her. She smiled and waved. To her surprise, she also saw Kyle Damon sitting behind Zell, flashing her a smile of encouragement. She waved back cheerfully, trying to hide her nerves and the pain she was in that was slowly worsening.

"Hello, Lydia," a voice said sweetly. Her heat skipped a beat as she turned around, trying to find the source of the voice. And there, behind her, sat the blond woman who she had met in the parking lot. "I thought I'd come to see your big day," she said, smiling, her voice dripping with honey. "How do you know me?" Lydia demanded, keeping her voice just loud enough for the woman to hear.

"Good luck, Lydia," the woman said, avoiding her question. "I'll be watching you out there."

She decided to simply ignore her so not to make a scene and turned around. The lights went out slowly and a spotlight clicked on a moment later, highlighting a man standing in the center of the arena, holding a microphone.

"You all feelin' alright out there?!" he shouted into the microphone, more as a statement than an inquiry. Jeez, Lydia thought. This is a SeeD exam, not a goddamned Ritchie And The Destroyers concert.

The audience screamed in reply.

"Alright! Let's give a big welcome for Balamb Garden's SeeD candidates of 2036!"

"Yay, Lydie!" the woman behind her clapped.

There came a sudden, loud snort from off to side of the arena.

"Each candidate will be facing a most difficult battle indeed. For each candidate today will be facing none other than the great.....BAHAMUT!"

A second spotlight clicked on, illuminating a large, dark blue winged creature who was grooming his wings, his yellow eyes trained on the crowd. The crowd erupted in cheers.

"ENOUGH BULLSHIT!" Bahamut roared, flapping his wings angrily. "LET'S GET THE SHOW ON THE ROAD!!"

"Of course, you won't be able to destroy Bahamut, but he'll decide whether or not you've passed. If you can inflict enough damage upon him, he'll let you pass through to the exit, where you'll be given your certificate. Any questions? Alright! Ann Marie Asioto, come on down! You're up first!"

"Oh dear, the woman behind Lydia said quietly. "If it's alphabetical, you'll be last, now, won't you? How unfortunate that you'll have to wait so long...."

Lydia resisted the urge to shout at the woman and leaned back in her seat, her stomach pain beginning to abait slightly.

Ann Marie stepped out into the center of the arena and turned to face Bahamut. She pulled out her weapon, a long, plain blade (but not a gunblade like Squall used) and tossed its holder aside, standing poised to strike.

"One the count of three," the announcer said. "One...two...THREE!"

Before Ann Marie could take a step forward, Bahamut bounded forward and whacked her casually with one powerful wing, as if swatting a fly. She shrieked as all two hundred pounds of her slammed into the side of the stands. The crowed cheered as she struggled to climb to her feet, disorineted. Bahamut watched in amusement as she bent down to find her glasses. The battle ended two minutes later with Ann Marie being helped to safety, her glasses smashed, and her face bloodied.

"LET'S HAVE A BIT OF A CHALLENGE NOW SHALL WE?" Bahamut taunted. "WHO'S NEXT?!" he thundered, the walls of the arena shaking.

Josh Bowie came next (Lydia had never seen so much blood in her life), and as the announcer went down the list, one by one, (Caldwell, Crandall, Doorman, Dykstra, Field, Fry, Funk, Garnett, Golden, Harcourt, Hart, Howser, Jelsma, Lane, McCoy, Nausadana, Otto, Reiner, Ritter, Saranetti, Shriver, Shumaker, Tate, Trivedi, Ulrich, Williams, Van der Lind, Van Zandt)

As Jonathan Van Zandt came down to the center of the arena, his bright red nunchakus in hand, the crowd cheering wildly, Lydia's stomachs pains that had slowly abated during the exam came back with the force of a charging bull. She was hit with a cramp that smashed into her full force, knocking her breath away. She stood up, panicked, and felt saliva dripping down her chin as she was overcome by dizziness.

"Lydia, are you alright?" the woman behind her said, a slight note of concern in her voice. "Lydie?"

She began retching, hard, and horribly dry heaves. Her eyes watered as her neck snapped forward with each heave.

"I don't know, I think she's puking...." she heard a voice beside her say.

"Lydia?" an alarmed voice called.

She climbed out from the stands and began to rush to the bathroom, her hand over her mouth.

But before she could leave the center ring where the battle had just begun, her eyes rolled into the back of her head and she suddenly passed out, collapsing on the ground, and she became engulfed in darkness.

"It hurts so bad," a woman's voice echoed through a deep, dark tunnel. "You're supposed to be taking care of me....."

".....nothing but a rotting piece of meat on the couch......you bitch....."

"Doug......what's happened to you....I don't know what's happened to you......"

There was a loud woman's scream. A scream of agony.

"WHERE ARE YOU?!" a man's voice thundered off in the distance.

"Mr. Saw.....I'm scared...." a little girl's voice whispered, her voice echoing off the walls of this deep dark tunnel. ".....never acted like this before....."

"Hush, sweetheart," a deep voice called. "Everything will be fine. Hush a baby."

"YOU LITTLE SHIT! YOU LITTLE-"

"Saw, help me!"

"LYDIA!!"

"If it'll make him stop…"

"Mr. Saw!!"

"What have I done? What have I done?!"

"Lydia!"

Lydia's eyes flew open. "So disfigured....she's so disfigured.......Mr. Saw.....back's twisting....drinking again.....we'll be better off, so I'll do it.....Das Nuessan...." a series of meaningles, random phrases flew from Lydia's mouth as she lay sprawled on the packed dirt floor of the arena, her brown eyes wide, her forehead drenched in sweat, her chin soaked with saliva.

"Lydia, snap out of it!" her eyes slowly came into focus. "Zell?" she whispered. "That you?"

"Lydia, what happened to you?" He asked, trembling. "It was like you had a fit or something..."

The lights in the arena had been turned on, and paramedics were at her side, moving her onto a stretcher. The sounds of her dream had vanished, erased from her memory as though it had never happened.

"What happened? I'm fine...I don't need-"

"Lydia, we're taking you to the emergency room to have you checked out," the female paramedic above her said, strapping on a neck brace. "Are you epileptic? Do you have any illnesses or allergies you know about?"

"No."

"Let's get her out of here."

And before she knew what was happening, she was being carried away from the arena.


	9. Chapter 9

Zell paced nervously through the waiting room of St. Mary's Emergency Room, occasionally picking up a magazine, flipping through it, and tossing it aside. Others crowded the waiting room, including Xu and Kyle Damon, waiting for the news-any news. Anything but this cloud of tension that stretched across the room and threatened to snap at any moment.

"Man, relax," Kyle snapped, running his hand through his hair, which was perfectly in place as usual.

Zell gritted his teeth and fell into a chair across from him and stared defiantly back at him. "What are you doing here anyway?" he snapped at the boy who was flipping through a copy of Girl Next Door, eyeing the centerfold blond who was posing atop a motorcycle.

"I want to make sure she's gonna be okay," he replied without taking his eyes from the pages. "How is it any of your business?"

Before Zell could reply, the door opened and a plump, middle aged nurse entered the waiting room, a stethoscope around her neck.

"How is she?" Zell asked, jumping up.

"She's going to be just fine. Just a bit of heat sickness, that's all. That arena really needs to get that air conditioner fixed," she went on, handing the woman at the reception desk a form. "My husband went to the game there last night and he saw more than a few people faint from the heat. They're either gonna get off their cheap asses and fix the blessed thing, or there's gonna be some lawsuits popping up, that's all I can say."

Lydia came into the waiting room appearing weary and slightly embarrassed.

"Am I okay to go?"

"Yeah, just remember what I said about keeping yourself watered in this weather. Don't exert yourself, just take it easy and try and stay in the air conditioning whenever possible."

Kyle got approached Lydia and put his hands on her shoulders. "You okay?" he asked, looking into her eyes.

She nodded wearily. "I'll be okay," she said, forcing a smile.

"Let's get out of here. I'll give you a ride home."

"That'd be great." She turned to Zell, nearly forgetting that he was there.

"Oh....thanks for coming out to see me, Zell. I really fucked things up today," she said, rubbing her forehead as if she was suffering from a headache. "So much for being a SeeD," she said with a little laugh.

"Don't-" Zell started.

"Don't think like that," Kyle interrupted, finishing for him. "It wasn't your fault. There's always next year. What do you say we get out of here and we'll go catch a movie or something, get your mind off things?"

Zell's felt his blood boil as he slipped his arm around her shoulder and led her towards the revolving front doors. He turned and flashed Zell a wink that was anything but friendly.

That evening Zell pulled up outside of Ma Dincht's house, took a moment to listen to the last few notes of his favorite Propagator Posse hit, and killed the ignition. She had invited him over for dinner the day before and was eager for the chance to savor her home cooking. While a hotdog with the works from Al's Dogz always hit the spot, nobody made fried Ochu or butterscotch chicken like Ma Dincht. He unlocked the front door and stepped inside, closing the door behind him and stuffing his keys in his pants pocket.

"Ma, I'm home!" he called, peeking into the kitchen. He quickly noticed something was amiss. The smell of dinner-or lack thereof. And the temperature. The room was absolutely freezing despite the summer heat.

"Ma, where are you?"

He peeked inside the dining room and looked around. Nothing. No plates had been set.

He began to feel worried and entered the den, where the tv was on, playing the evening news.

"Ma? I'm home!"

He ran up the stairs where he found the bathroom and both bedrooms empty. She could have ran to pick up something from the grocery store-if her station wagon hadn't been parked out front. Feeling more worried by the second he hurried to the Mc McClendon's house next door and knocked on the door.

"Who's there?"

"It's Zell!" he called back.

The door opened and a tall, slender woman and her young son standing at the door.

"Zell!" the boy cried, excited.

"Zell, what a pleasant surprise!" the woman said, wiping her hands on the front of her apron. "Visiting your ma?"

"Hey, Rascal. Um, actually, I'm wondering if you've seen her. I was supposed to come home for dinner, but the place is empty. The tv was still on so I dunno what...."

Mrs. McClendon stuck her head outside and looked next door. "Huh. Car still there," she reported, as if Zell were blind.

"You haven't seen her?"

"Not since this morning when I went over to borrow some flour. There's Al, maybe he's seen her."

Zell turned around and saw Al Fagen, the owner of Al'z Dogs passing by on his bike, his little boy pedaling quickly to keep up with him.

"Hey, Al?"

He came to a stop and the little boy ran into his back tire.

"Zell here's wondering if you might have seen Margorie around."

He sat thoughtfully, drumming his fingers on his hand brake. "Not since yesterday, no. Everything alright?"

"We'd better start a search party," Mrs. McClendon said, becoming as worried as Zell.

"You guys seem pretty worried. I'll check around, maybe she walked out to the grocers or somethin'. "Come on Frankie," he ordered the boy behind him. "Watch for cars."


	10. Chapter 10

Later that night, Zell sat in Balamb Garden's computer lab, sifting through his email, his mind on everything but what was on the screen in front of him. That had scared the shit out of him, the way Lydia had passed out during the SeeD exam. He remembered how her eyes had rolled so far back into her head that only the whites showed, how the saliva trickled down her chin, how she collapsed onto the floor of the arena with a sickening thud.

How she muttered in her sleep.

How they had tried to wake her up, but she did nothing but mumbled, her eyelids twitching, her face breaking out in a cold sweat.

And what had she mumbled? All kinds of nonsense that meant nothing to him, but must have meant something to her. Something about a saw, something about somebody being disfigured....

And now his ma was missing. God, what a day from hell.

He craned his neck as he heard the door to the lab open. It was Lydia.

"Hey, Zell," she said, slightly surprised. "Don't see you in here very often."

She pulled up a seat a few computers down and turned the computer on.

"How you feeling?"

"I'm doing okay," she replied, tucking a strand of dark hair behind her ear as she leaned closer toward the computer screen. "Embarrassed."

"Where'd Kyle take you?"

"Oh...um, we went to see Crimson Rain. Kyle's been dieing to see it."

"Crimson Rain? That's pretty bloody, ain't it?"

She laughed. "How'd you guess?"

"I didn't know you were into slashers."

"I'm not, but Kyle wanted to see it, so I humored him. We're going out again tomorrow night. He wants to go see a Serpents game."

"Listen, Lydia," Zell began, clicking the computer off and moving to the chair beside her, "I heard that Kyle's kind of a...."

"Kind of a what?"

"I heard he treats his girlfriends like dogs," he said bluntly. "Miranda Bisken went out with him a while back and she said he was a total control freak. Said he roughed her up when she tried to stand up to him."

Lydia sat in silence, examing Zell's concerned face.

"Listen, Zell....I don't know what rumors you might have heard, but Kyle's a really nice guy."

"You really like him?"

"I wouldn't be going out with him tomorrow if I didn't."

The door opened once again and Headmaster Cid stuck his head in. "Zell, the police are here. They want to ask you some questions."

"What's going on?" Lydia asked, her eyes wide after Cid closed the door behind him.

"I stopped by my house today for dinner and ma wasn't there, but her car was still parked out front" Zell said, rising to his feet. "The police have been out looking for her."

"Oh my God, I hope she's okay..."

He followed Cid into the hall where two police officers stood, looking solemn. One was tall and string bean thin, with wavy black hair, the other shorter and balding.

"Something's wrong...what happened to her?" Zell demanded in a shaky voice.

"You're Zell Dincht?" the short officer demanded.

"Yeah, what-"

"Your mother's still missing. No sign of her anywhere. We're probably looking at an abduction. The neighbors were on the front lawn sitting with company. They saw her come home from the grocery store at approximately 5:00 PM. You arrived at your home at 5:30 PM. That leaves less than a half hour for her to have been kidnapped, a half hour in which the neighbors were on their front lawn, lots of people going for evening walks. If you had a backdoor, that'd be another story."

"What does it mean?" Zell asked, struggling to contain his nerves.

"It means either the kidnapper was pretty damned slick, or your ma vanished ino thin air. You guess."

The door to the lab opened and Lydia came out, her arms crossed over her chest, her face slightly pale.

"Did they find her?"

"Miss, if you're not part of the Dincht family, I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to give us some privacy," the short officer said, gesturing down the hall.

"Oh, okay. Sorry," she said, casting Zell a sympathetic look as she headed toward the dormitories.

"We'd like you to come up to the headmaster's office for some questioning, if you don't mind."


End file.
